A journal entry from 2020, when I was a barista/manager at a coffee shop:
A firefighter once told me “thank you” for what I do after I expressed my appreciation for their services to our community. It was delightfully unexpected. I did not expect a thank you with that level of sincerity, especially from someone who I feel has a much more essential role to our society.
I’ve been making coffee to make a living and it’s not often I come to work with the thought that I have this huge purpose. I grind beans. I pour water. I add cream and sugar, if you’d like.
For most people, what I do is nothing.
When I judge myself about where I could’ve been by now—if only I had made different choices—all it ever feels like is nothing.
A barista is a common occupation to compare to the job of a firefighter as something less. While my 17 year old cousin believes that being a barista might be the coolest job in the world, I however, at 29 nearing 30, do not.
But, why?
My job does not define me. And while I may very well have been on a more “successful” path if I made different choices, that itself is only a reality as much as I allow it to be.
What does being successful even mean, exactly?
Because while my job may be as simple as grinding beans pouring water, adding cream and sugar, it can be as meaningful to that of a firefighter’s if I am showing up as my best self for the person across the counter. For the people I work with.
I’ve had multiple customers express such gratitude, especially during these COVID-19 conditions, for just making them a cup of coffee. Because more often than not, it is more than just coffee.
It is the interaction. It is the being a part of each other’s routines. It is what the coffee and experience allows them to feel — like they can begin their days. It is the verbal exchanges. The eye contact. The smiles. Their only moment of connection.
For someone, my nothing could be their everything.
So as much as I may not have the most glamorous, or highest paying job in the world, the fact that I have a job, is beautiful. The fact that I can choose to make a difference in and outside of my role is beautiful. And I do my best to remind myself of that as often as possible.
Day Job Affirmations:
I don’t need to love my day job to be grateful for it. My day job is not connected to my identity. My day job provides me with the source of income I need to cultivate the creative life that I desire. I don’t need to feel fulfilled at my day job in order for my day job to fill up the numbers in my bank account. My day job is helping me speed up the process of becoming debt free. My day job will not rob me of my livelihood. I will no longer allow my day job to be emotionally laborious. I will not waste my creative energy performing for customers or co workers at my day job. I will show up as my authentic self and do my best to deliver kindness through that authenticity. Kindness is not niceness. I can tell the truth at my day job without being disrespectful. I cannot control the reactions others have to any truth that I share. I will not expect my day job to deliver me happiness. I will be responsible for my happiness.
Related Recs:
A beautiful essay from the 2017 archives by Toni Morrison: “The Work You Do, The Person You Are.”
Issa Rae’s podcast episode on How I Built This with Guy Raz.
This video of Elizabeth Gilbert on the difference between hobbies, jobs, careers, and vocation.
A piece on an exhibit at Blanton Museum of Art in Austin, TX that showcases how side gigs can fuel creativity.